This lifetime is a journey of finding your deepest truth. Every situation in your life that is a source of struggle or pain is an area in which you are learning about being true to your soul, your innermost Self.
You have many roles you play, and you experience different truths at different times. You may rehearse a speech, but when you meet someone, you find yourself saying something completely different. So you ask, “What is truth?” What is true one moment may not be true the next. Is truth fluid or is there a deeper truth that will last from moment to moment? All of you are fluid at the personality level, with many identities. Your soul, your core self, holds that deeper truth that is unchanging and constant.
You do not have to go through pain and struggle to grow
The doorway to deeper truth is awareness. It is paying attention to, and holding up, the vision of truth. The more you act from your integrity, the more evolved you become. Every situation in your life that requires truth from you, that requires you to reach into a deeper level of your being, is an opportunity to grow. The more pain and struggle you experience, the greater the amount of energy you clean up when you live from a deeper level of truth.
Thank those situations in your life that seem difficult or painful. Know that they are opportunities to reach a deeper truth. Not a truth that will separate you, bring you anger, justify your feelings of separation, or make the other person wrong and you right or vice versa, but a truth that will allow you to connect at a deeper level.
To raise your energy higher, go inward and ask if you are withholding from yourself the truth of what you feel or think about the other person. If you do not let yourself recognize the truth, you will have another person and another sent your way until you do get in touch with your deepest truth.
For instance, you may have always wanted affection and nurturing from your partner. You get into relationships that do not satisfy these deeper needs, and you tell yourself you should not, and do not, need to have your needs fulfilled. Your deepest truth is that you do need this, and until you get in touch with that truth and act upon it you will continue to experience pain.
Every time you act and speak the truth with integrity, you lighten your energy. Your past beliefs, lesser thoughts, and stuck emotions can appear as a fog around you that stands between you and the light of your soul. Each time you speak and connect with the light of truth, the energy around you becomes finer and lighter, until the fog is dissipated and the light of your soul pours into you and radiates through you and out to the world.
Every drama in your outer life is a reflection of a drama in your inner life. Every person you are interacting with in your outer life symbolizes an interaction of energy that is going on within you. Think of a person in your life you are struggling with. Imagine you are looking at yourself through his or her eyes. Put yourself in his or her place. Go into your heart and imagine coming from a deep, compassionate level of truth when you are with this person.
For example, if you have been feeling angry with or resentful of someone, and you open up to experience your deepest truth, you may realize that you really do love this person even if he or she disappointed you. From that place within you, you can let go of the hurt and speak to this person with love. Picture this person responding with joy as the energy between you grows lighter.
Every person and event offers you an opportunity to evolve yourself and move into a higher consciousness. The greatest reward is that once you clear up an issue, you will usually never have to deal with it again. Another person cannot hurt you unless you are hurting yourself. You cannot be betrayed, undervalued, or unloved unless you are doing it to yourself by not valuing and loving yourself.
You have the greatest power of all, the ability to heal and evolve yourself
When you change, heal, and evolve yourself, everything around you that represented your inner struggle dissolves. You can heal yourself by speaking the truth from a deep level of compassion. For instance, you may be thinking that someone does not value your feelings. As you look one level deeper at the truth, you say to yourself, “She is just being herself, and she is not very aware of anyone’s feelings — not just mine.” Or, “He is in pain himself and does not realize he is hurting me.” As you look even deeper, you realize that you have let people treat you that way, that you have not valued your own feelings, and that there have been many times you wanted to speak up. You can continue to look deeper until you feel a release from the pain and acceptance for the person involved.
Look at the different personalities within you. One is very strong, another observes everything you do with detachment, another is young and emotional, and another is very wise. If there is any drama going on around you, you can know that there is a drama going on inside of you between your various parts.
One woman felt betrayed by her girlfriend when a secret she had confided was told to another. Upon closer examination, she realized that she had betrayed her true Self in many ways, and that the outer drama was meant to show her what she was doing to herself.
Being compassionate means being truthful. How often do you rehearse in your mind what you are going to say to someone because you are justifying yourself, protecting your self-image, talking about how great you are or how right you are? Every time you find yourself mentally rehearsing a situation (as everyone does) ask, “Can I express one deeper level of truth?” You can always find at least one small way to be more loving, understanding, and compassionate.
Finding your deepest truth means looking within. It means not blaming other people, not playing the victim, and not spending time feeling sorry for yourself. When you look more deeply at any situation, you will discover that you set it up for your own growth. In any situation where you felt you were a victim, you always had an inkling of what was going on and ignored opportunities to change things.
As you look more deeply at things that really bother you, I propose a thought: Nothing you are upset about is caused by what you think it is. For instance, you may be upset that your friend accused you of doing something you did not do. Upon deeper examination, you will find that it is a re-creation of an earlier pain, played out over and over in changing scenery with different people until you resolve it. It may be a reenactment of a childhood drama in which someone accused you of things you did not do.
Strong reactions of pain, anger, or resentment you feel in present time are almost always caused by a childhood experience that evoked similar feelings. You re-create the pain so that you can evolve and move beyond it. Next time you feel angry at someone, stop. Close your eyes and go within. Acknowledge that you have had similar experiences or felt these emotions before. Realize that you are reliving some childhood decision or painful event, and that now is an opportunity to end this pattern in your life and instead experience your deepest truth. Realize that you draw other people into your life to play out certain roles with you that will help you evolve. Let go of any anger or blame you feel toward them.
Excerpted from the book Personal Power Through Awareness. ©1986, 2019 by Sanaya Roman. Printed with permission from New World Library — newworldlibrary.com.
Sanaya Roman has been channeling Orin, a wise and gentle spirit teacher, for many years. Orin has assisted hundreds of thousands of people to awaken spiritually. Sanaya and Orin provide a path of selfrealization through their books, audio courses, and seminars. You can read more about Sanaya and Orin’s teachings at orindaben.com.
